Category Archive: sex

Sexuality workshops and play spaces lubricated my gender fluidity

The first time I was asked which pronoun I use for myself was at a sexuality workshop run by Curious Creatures. Being asked this at the beginning of the workshop gave it the unexpected benefit of empowering me on my gender journey. I was later empowered through play parties and experiencing the rich diversity within …

Anorexia and sexuality: pleasure and control

Content warning: this article discusses eating disorders.   I was having dinner with two friends. Well, they were having dinner; I was going to eat something when I got home, made within the safe confines of my small kitchen, where I was able to meticulously measure every last element before it passed my lips. One …

A love letter to stripping

A love letter to stripping

I’ve only been in Japan two weeks and I miss you so much already. I’m not saying I didn’t think I’d miss you, but I definitely didn’t think I’d miss you this much, this quickly. The girls called me from the dressing room at the club last night, and I was so jealous. They were …

Archer Asks: Nic Holas, co-founder of The Institute of Many

Nic Holas is a writer, activist and the co-founder of The Institute of Many (TIM), an advocacy platform and grassroots movement for People Living with HIV. TIM has the largest membership of any HIV organization in Australia. We chatted with Nic to talk about U=U, TIM’s latest campaign aiming to highlight the message that an …

Fanfiction: Coding homosexuality as a teenager

When I was about 15, I was up to my neck in the fanfiction community. I had read the epics, masturbated to the smutty ones, and even dabbled in penning my own teen angst romance creations about the Canadian cartoon, Total Drama Island. They’re still online, but I’ll take my username to the grave. I …

Asexuality and the politics of memory, abuse and consent

I had sex for the first time when I was sixteen. My boyfriend and I had a hotel for the weekend. The first night he set up candles and turned down the lights. It was respectably romantic. I faked a headache. At this point we had been dating for nearly a year and I had …

“Writing had been my vice all along”: Louis’ Story

This story was first published on Staying Negative, a website that aims to emotionally engage and inspire gay/bisexual men, including trans men, through the sharing of personal stories. Read more about how you can share your story here. Content note: this story discusses mental health and suicide.   I was born and raised in Melbourne. Even before …

Cruising: Public sex and the queer resistance to gay assimilation

He’s been paddling in the pool for 20 minutes, locking eyes with every member of the water polo team. I’m reclining by the edge of the water with my shirt unbuttoned. When he gets out to sit on the grass, I get up slowly and walk towards the showers. A few minutes later, he follows me …

Opening up a relationship: Compersion, insecurity and ethical non-monogamy

Sunday morning and I’m sitting at the table in the Melbourne house I bought with Mojo, my partner of seven years. Our two cats groom each other in the sunlight. A Subaru is parked in the driveway. We tick all the boxes of middle-class lesbian cliché, although I’m a stripper and she’s a musician, so …

Tilly Lawless: Making space as a sex worker

She asks me: “How do lesbians have sex?” Just five minutes ago we had shared a cock together, looking up between mouthfuls to laugh with our eyes in joyful collusion at the client’s expense. I’m slightly shocked that in her years of working, she’s never come across a “real lesbian”, as she calls me; that …

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The Australian journal of sexual diversity.